To Last Forever

One morning last week I woke up at 4:30 am, wide awake.  When I realized I wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon, I pulled out my phone, glanced at my e-mail quick, then remembered a talk I've been wanting to reread -- Sister Linda Burton's talk on "The Power, Joy, and Love of Covenant Keeping."  

But I really didn't get very far into it before my mind turned specifically to the marriage covenant, and I went searching on my Gospel Library app for a talk on that instead.  I found one called "Eternal Marriage" by F. Burton Howard that I dove into.  It's a good one, and I was reading and highlighting away till almost the end, when I hit what I was woken up at 4:30 am to be taught.

Elder Howard led into it with a story about their silverware, and how over the years his wife carefully cared for it, to the point that he was thinking she was a little over the top over this silverware.  But then he realized,

If you want something to last forever,

you treat it differently.

My eyes stopped there, the Spirit teaching me.  I thought first and the most about my marriage, and eventually about my children.  Words came to mind like a list from the Family Proclamation - love, respect, compassion, forgiveness, trust.

And accompanying that, the desire to be better.

I finally pushed myself to continue in the talk.  "If you want something to last forever, you treat it differently.  You shield it and protect it. You never abuse it. You don’t expose it to the elements. You don’t make it common or ordinary. If it ever becomes tarnished, you lovingly polish it until it gleams like new. It becomes special because you have made it so, and it grows more beautiful and precious as time goes by."

Beautiful.

In our homeschool group we've been memorizing Doctrine and Covenants 6:33, and that came to mind.  "Fear not to do good . . . for whatsoever ye sew, that shall ye also reap; therefore, if ye sew good ye shall also reap good for your reward."  That first word, fear, is sadly powerful in the wrong way.  Sad that the desire to do good can so easily be derailed, even within a family.  Laying there in bed I made some immediate commitments to myself with some specific ways to be better.

I'm so incredibly grateful for a Heavenly Father that cares enough about making sure I got this precious message that He sent it when things are quiet, even if it meant missed sleep for me.  I've been so blessed with  a wonderful husband and family.  They are the joy and the greatest work of my life, the things that more than anything I want to last forever.

Becoming Together

At stake conference we were blessed to get to listen to Robert D. Hales and a new Seventy, Kent F. Richards. They both talked about counseling with one another in marriage, and while I appreciated the message, the visual was just as great - both their wives spoke for a few minutes as well. It was very easy to see that both of these couples are amazing because of their great spouses. That not only were they wonderful people themselves, together with their spouses they become even more. Part of Elder Richards' message was that as we work together and counsel together, together we can become.

I am blessed to have Jamie as my husband. Not saying things are easy sailing, but I do think we compliment one another. Always room to grow, but we compliment one another. One of these days (years? centuries?) after lots of practice I hope we can become that beautiful couple of oneness, excited about the things we've been able to teach one another.

We are practicing, though probably not really on purpose (maybe if we tried on purpose it would happen faster?). One day I mentioned to Jamie that I was asked to prepare something about scriptures and kids. "Are you taking your scripture music?" One of my favorite scripture reading with kids methods, calling everyone together with our scripture music. Though I had been thinking about the request all day, that tip hadn't even occurred to me.

The other day I was talking to the kids about foods. One had been unwilling to try a blackberry the day before, and suddenly she announced that she likes blueberries. She's been anti blueberries for a few years at least, so to have her announce that out of the blue (pun not intended but it works) was surprising. In explaining the silliness of not being willing to at least try new things, I told the kids that there are gobs of foods I had never eaten before I married their dad, and the same was true that I had introduced new things to him as well. Silly not to try new things, just silly! (Dang it Jamie, after all that maybe I have try sushi sometime.)

Did it ever occur to you that the only member of your family you choose is your spouse? Parents, nope. Siblings, definite nope. Children, triple nope. These are carefully planned blessings I'm sure, but the only person you get to have any kind of control in adding to your family circle is your spouse. I know I need him so I can be my best, and I hope the reciprocation is true as well.

(I’ve been working on this post for a couple of weeks, and though it still doesn’t feel done, I’m just posting.)