Review: Clearing Your Clutter with Feng Shui

If you read past posts of mine, you know keeping the house clean is a real issue for me. I've tried so many systems and schedules, till I realized one day that it was all the 'stuff' that was killing me and I needed to get rid of more 'stuff' before I could even start to feel ahead. Unfortunately, it is deeply engrained in my genes to hold tightly to whatever enters my home. While opening wedding presents my mom told me I should save the paper and bows. I'm not sure where the paper is, but I still haven't been able to toss that box of bows! Weeded it down, but many still there ("If I ever wrap a present ahead of time, I could dig through the box for a nice bow to top it off!").

Anyway, wandering through the library at the end of October I noticed this book on the shelf and thought what the heck, I'm always looking for good ideas. I knew nothing about feng shui (not entirely sure I know much more now) but I figured I would take that with a grain of salt and go digging for the good clearing clutter ideas.

What a find! Since I've been reading this I've found myself tossing and organizing like crazy. If I didn't have so many things to do besides, I could truly "ninja through [my] home like a white tornado, decluttering with glee" as Ms. Kingston mentions at one point in her book. As it stands, I'm just part-time ninja, or when-I-get-the-chance ninja, though still doing it with glee.

Here are some of her other words of wisdom as a record for myself, if nothing else:

"[When you hold on to clutter] you tend to look back rather than forward in your life... You have to release the past to create a better tomorrow."

"After clutter clearing you are likely to surprise yourself by wanting to do things you have put off for a long time."

"Write a list of all the things you would love to do if only your clutter were sorted, and let this be the inspiration for you to get on with it."

"Keeping things 'just in case' indicates a lack of trust in the future... The more you can learn to trust that life will take care of you, the more life will take care of you."

"Life is constant change. So when something comes into your life, enjoy it, use it well, and when it is time, let it go. It is that simple. Just because you own something, it doesn't mean that you have to keep it forever. You are just a temporary custodian of many things as they pass through your life."

"Get in the habit of leaving a trail of discarded clutter in your wake, and start to think of it as a sign of progression!"

"Everything you are holding on to through fear is blocking you having more love in your life; clearing it allows more love to start pouring in. Fear stops you from being who you truly are and doing what you came here to do; clutter clearing brings you greater clarity about your life purpose... Letting go of clutter leaves you free to be you, which is the greatest gift you can ever give yourself."

On books, "Your books symbolically represent your ideas and beliefs... Learn to let your books go when it is time." Besides all the obvious ones like cookbooks you don't use and textbooks you haven't used for years, "There are books that inspired you deeply years ago but whose concepts are now so much a part of you that you no longer need to read them anymore. Aim to end up with a collection of books that represents you as you are today and the intended 'you' of tomorrow."

"Sit down and make a list of the many things [you] want to do in [your] life that [you aren't] allowing [yourself] to do because of unfinished jobs."

"Working with a clear desk increases productivity, creativity, and job satisfaction... It is psychologically far more uplifting to start with a clear desk than with mounds of paperwork, which makes you feel defeated before you even start."

She goes a bit into physical, emotional, and spiritual clutter as well, but I think I'm doing okay there, with a big yikes at her discussion on colon cleansing (I'll stick with my basement, thanks). All the advice has been motivating so far. So much to do, so little time.

Fermenting

One thing I learned through high school and college English classes (not necessarily taught there, but learned through) is that it is nice to get your thoughts down about things and let them ferment for a while. Then when you go back, you can look at them with fresh eyes and see where things are lacking and/or need more explanation.

I have a few posts fermenting.

Seeing as how I'm a procrastinator, even a day of fermenting time was a blessing during school. This is nice to let things just sit as long as they need. The only problem with not having a deadline is forgetting they are there.

I never fancied myself a poet, but lately here and there I've had bits of poems jump into my head. How odd is that? One is about feet of all things. I believe that one day they'll appear on here (the poems, not the feet).

Do You Have Your Own Too?

It had been one of those days. You know, one of THOSE days. The light fixtures were barely intact from the kids bouncing off the walls. Every request/plea/beg fell on deaf ears. I headed numbly downstairs to check on the laundry, but flopped down on the steps almost to the bottom. And just sat. And stared. Very blankly. After a time I realized no one had followed me and no one was looking for me, so I kept sitting, enjoying the alone-ness of it.

I looked down and saw a book in my hand that for whatever reason I had grabbed on my way downstairs, called "You Can Childproof Your Home, but They'll Still Get In" (see it
here). My mother had given it to me for Christmas several months before but I had yet to crack it open. So I did. In the introduction I found:

Child development professionals categorize children into two main groups:

(A) Naturally compliant, obedient, well-mannered children
(B) Yours

"How did he know?" I thought sarcastically. "Maybe he sat behind us at church sometime. Or followed us through the grocery store." I read on.

The implication is rather obvious. If you are blessed with naturally compliant, obedient, well-mannered children, they were accidentally switched at the hospital. But this is not necessarily a bad thing. In a sense, you could look at it as though you won the lottery, and someone else even bought your ticket for you.

Most parents, however, end up with their own children. But don't panic quite yet. Bringing your own children home from the hospital doesn't mean they are destined to be incompliant, disobedient, and ill-mannered, but it does mean that you have to devote massive amounts of time and energy to avoid that outcome. Left to themselves, your children have a natural propensity to be self-centered, pugnacious, and ill-tempered and, if they are boys, wear oversized trousers with enough denim to fashion a Coleman tent.

This book is for all the parents who ended up with their own kids. It is not a professional parenting manual, as I am not a professional. I am just a dad. But I hope that you will find some insight and some helpful tips in my observations, reflections, ruminations, grousings, mutterings, stunned exclamations, incredulous questions, inane outbursts, bulging neck arteries, apologies, failures, and occasional successes.

By the time I finished I felt far less alone, yet the kids still hadn't found me.

I realized I KNOW families who have some of those switched kids. They are almost eerily well-behaved. "Stay here with me, sweetheart." And they DO! I've had glimpses of that, but never the real thing. If they have to be switched to get it, do I want it? Hmmm....

The rest of the book is also worthwhile reading, but this introduction stuck with me longer than anything else. It taught another lesson I didn't expect - that a good laugh certainly goes a long way to keep mom sane.

And for the record, I'm very glad I have my own. My own insanity-inducing, mother-torturing children, but MY children.

Ahhhh, the Memories

Jamie's sister's husband Bobby told Adam that if he takes and passes a hunter's safety course he will take him hunting with him. Of course Adam has become even more hunting obsessed than he already was. We're not sure where he got this hunting gene, but it arrived somehow. Maybe something extra in the prenatal vitamins the doc preferred back that time around?

He loves to read about elk and deer, plays this Cabela's Big Game Hunter game, checks out hunting videos from the library, and can make the most amazing elk calls.

Since the invitation to go hunting, he and his friend have started a 'hunting club.' They pack all kinds of odd gear into their backpacks and either head to the backyard or the park to practice their stalking and hunting skills. Today it was the backyard. It was nice and quiet inside, so of course my trouble alarm went crazy. Sammy, Melanie, and Carolyn were all off playing at neighbor's houses. I glance in the front yard - bikes and scooters, no Adam or friends. I glance in the backyard - hmmmm... backpacks by the trees. All the signs point to them being here. I step out onto the deck and still don't see anything. Then, out pops a head from some sparse bushes and lilac greens in the far corner of the yard. "What do you want?" (I heckle the friends, they heckle me.)

"Oh! Just checking to see if you guys were out here."

Knowing that the friend was out hiding, I knew then where Adam was - doing the same in the raspberry patch. I step back inside and watch for a minute. Yep, saw him move a bit.

A bit later I hear elk calls coming from the backyard.

"Dang he's good," I thought.

They were having so much fun it made me want to play too. From inside the house I started doing my horrible version of an elk bugle back. I wasn't close enough to hear, but I'm sure they were significantly amused at my attempt. It worked though - the elk called back to me! Okay, so it was just the boys, but still. We called back and forth for a while, then I had more fun up my sleeve. I grabbed a walking stick one of the kids left hanging out in the kitchen and started knocking it around on a kitchen chair and the table, attempting to sound like knocking antlers around. (See? I've learned a few tricks from Adam's hunting videos.) Success again! The elk responded.

This went on for a while before I decided that Jamie probably would appreciate a clean up attempt before he gets home. Without the calling from inside the house, the calling outside escalated then died off.

On days like this I just have to wonder what kind of odd memories I'm giving my children. I'm sure the neighbors wonder too.

To Impress You All Even More

It's funny to hear that people actually read this. Not too many, but still, just funny. I've received a few, "Don't you need to settle down?" comments after the last post. Well, keep watching and see how many of those actually end up on the 'finished' list. So little time, so many things that use up that time.

Last night I started reading another, called The Book of Mormon: A Pattern for Parenting. I'm enjoying it so far.

And two more soon to be added to the 'now reading' list:

Long Way to Chicago - This month's book group book.

One I put on hold just tonight that I learned about from a neighbor, Parenting the Ephraim's Child. Here's a brief excerpt from the description. "Like those of the tribe of Ephraim, an Ephraim’s Child has great determination, energy, and a headstrong will. Ephraim’s Children are also often high maintenance, emotional, controlling, and aggravating. What other sources don’t tell you is that these children are a special and covenant people." It talks about different characteristics of these children, and shows how "each is actually a strength in need of refinement" and "demonstrate[s] how these qualities can be valuable tools in the Lord’s hands." I'm excited to read it.

Am I Out of Control or WHAT?

I was going to update the 'Books I'm Reading' section, and maybe I still will, but when I stepped back to look at all that I'm reading I decided this deserves it's on listing. Besides, since homeschooling officially began, my writing opportunities have definitely dropped in frequency, so you just have to take what you can get. And actually, I started writing this, had no time to finish, and now I've finished some that I had sitting here. Hate that! So I've got to include some of the recently reads.

Currently Reading:

Writing Magic: Creating Stories that Fly - Just started this one earlier today. It's by the author of "Ella Enchanted." I happened upon it in the non-fiction children's section of the library during our last visit and thought it looked interesting. I've always wanted to be an author, but the whole fiction thing is beyond me.

The Candy Shop War - Jamie and I are reading this with the boys. Great story by the author of Fablehaven, Brandon Mull. I can't believe this guy sleeps at night for all the cool stories in his head. I heard the movie rights for this have been sold.

Raising Up a Family to the Lord - I've got this as a talk on tape and love it. Not too far in, but I'm hoping this builds more on the same.

Upside-Down Brilliance: The Visual-Spatial Learner - I learned about this one after being told Sammy is "very right-brained." Definitely interesting.

Smart Moves: Why Learning is not All in Your Head - Another one I'm reading for Sammy. I first heard about something called "Brain Gym," a concept of using exercises and stretches to turn on areas of your brain. From all that I gather, for "Smart Moves" those ideas were used and explained more, and furthered the concept. Not too far in.

Peter and the Shadow Thieves - We are listening to this on in the car right now. We've already listened to the first, Peter and the Starcatchers. Fun stories! Jim Dale (who read the Harry Potter series) recorded these ones as well.

And of all things...

Simplify: A Guide to Caring for the Soul - Simplify? Have you seen this list alone?? :) This isn't just on tossing things. It's also on being true to ourselves, kind to ourselves, and letting go (among even more things). I'm doing my best. We've all got to reach for something, eh?

Recently Read:

Goose Girl and Princess Academy - Wow, wow, wow. I am so amazed with Shannon Hale's writing. Great female characters, exciting story lines. I have myself on the list of about everything else of hers at the library.

The Read-Aloud Handbook - It was partially because of this one that I didn't finish writing this sooner. Had to finish it for this month's book group, especially since I was presenting it. Great motivator to read to your kids!

AAAIIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really don't intend to devote my entire blog to Carolyn, but she always has something up her sleeve to make me take notice. Usually it is her cuteness, her big chocolate brown eyes, freckles, and sweet grin, knowing if she turns on the charm she can weasel anything out of me. Today it was an earwig.

I was checking my e-mail a bit ago when she walked up and says, "Mommy, theah's something in ah house." (Sorry, I just have to try to write the cute way she talks. Translation: "Mommy, there's something in our house.") I turned to ask, "What is?", but before I can even take a breath to get it out I see an earwig crawling up her arm while she tries to keep it somewhat under control, but if you know anything about earwigs they are kind of fast and not very controllable. Then I took a really BIG breath (i.e. gasp!), and remembering an experience when my cousin, then about 2, walked in to his mother carrying a snakeskin very happily until his mother, my aunt, screamed and reacted very frightened, so he suddenly realized that it must be something he should be scared of too and would no longer touch it or get near it, even though we all know a snakeskin is perfectly harmless unless your 2 year old happens to wander in the house with one catching you totally off guard... So yah, that memory flashed through my mind and I just screamed inside instead of outloud and drawing on depths of calmness and using a really fake calm voice I said, "Oh look honey! You found an earwig! Doesn't he look neat?" By then he had succeeded in falling off her arm and was again running around on the floor, so again fakely calm, not wanting him to run under anything but again not wanting to make her afraid of it by freaking out or just squashing it (after all, she is kind of a bug lover) I said, "Let's get a nice big piece of paper and help him go back outside!"

I quickly got him to crawl on the paper, then headed for the back sliding glass door, all the while flipping and turning the paper so he wouldn't crawl off or crawl on ME, heaven forbid, because then the scream would most assuredly escape. Unfortunately, the blinds and door were closed, and I had to flip/turn the paper with one hand and scramble for the blind cord and door handle with the other, eyes always on the earwig. I finally got the door opened and went to fling him outside just as he succeeded in escaping the paper. He was back to the floor and on the run. Before I could get my paper to him again, Carolyn just reached on down, picked him up, struggled with him for a couple seconds while he tried to get away, then very calmly set him down outside. "Quick Mom! Close the doh-ah (door) so he can't get in again!" Whew! Our home is again safe, thanks to the bravery of my 3 year old, my knight in shining armor. Only, she was wearing a pink ballet outfit.

Carolyn Sue

"Charlotte's Web" is playing on the TV. Carolyn and I are sharing a pillow on the floor. She's watching. I'm reading.

Giggles erupt next to me while Wilbur gets a bath, then "Mom, I'm gonna get a pig like that."

"You are? What are you going to name him?"

"Wilbur!" More giggles.

She has quite the imaginary menagerie - a horse named Melango, a monkey named Titi (every time we go to the zoo she points him out and asks when we are going to get him), a dog named Mimi, and just recently, a bunny and a cat. So now I guess we can add a pig to that.

"Will your pig get scared of lightning too, like Wilbur?"

"No, he will sleep in the house with me."

"Oooooh, of course."

Always in her sweet little 3-year-old world, happy and full of life, completely heart-broken and even almost surprised when someone or something mistreats her. Like she can't believe anything bad could enter her fairy land.

"Can I have some hot chocolate milk?"

"Can I hold your pig when you get it?"

"Yah."

"Okay, let's go get some."

She is happy to be who she is, not realizing there is any other person to be. And I am delighted to be a part of her world.

A Drippy Walk

We are just one big adventure after another. Today's was much less eventful, though.

While sharing yesterday's adventure with some friends in the neighborhood, one of them asked if we had seen a remote control airplane, since her husband had been flying one, it headed off that direction, and never returned. Lo and behold, I HAD seen what looked like the tail end of an airplane but it was on the other side of the swampy so I didn't investigate.

So this morning I rounded up the kids to see if we could see if that was the airplane. Heading out we realized it was a little drizzly outside, but after a 4-1 vote (after all, Adam is a baseball player and they are afraid of rain) we decided to go for it. We stopped by Jason's to see if he wanted to go on a "drippy walk" with us.

It was actually quite nice and refreshing. They baby didn't even mind it a bit, packed along in the baby front pack. Rocks are so pretty when they are wet! Everything smelled fresh and clean. Here and there it got a bit "drippier," but never too awful. We even visited the spot where Melanie took her plunge. I need to remember the camera next time we head over there!

Sometimes I think I'm a big lunatic for attempting the ideas I come up with (i.e. yesterday), but today it was well worth it.

Oh, we never did find any sign of what I thought could have been the airplane, but there was also a more noticeable washer and dryer missing, so maybe another clean up crew went through.

Our 100 Year of Scouting Adventure

Happy 100 Years of Scouting today! Well yesterday, August 1st.

In our BSA council they've been advertising today as World-Wide Do a Good Turn Day. There is a group of scoutss that camped on Brownsea Island that as the sun rose this morning, renewed their committment to scouting and did a good turn.

Being the good scout that I AM, I rounded up the two cub scouts that live in my house (Adam and Sammy), and my three little girl cub scout wanna-be's (Melanie, Carolyn, and of course Erin) to go do a good turn. But I cannot stop there, as it is born within me to want to help other people have great scouting experiences as well. I called Adam's friend (Jason) and Sammy's friend (Cody) to see if they wanted to come along. Jason did, Cody didn't, but Cody's sister, Elizabeth, who is Adam's age, did want to. I knew it would be a bit of a challenge to keep everyone together and 'friendly,' but with promised rewards I knew we could do it.

We wanted to go clean up along a path near our neighborhood that I've heard is pretty trash-filled. It used to be a train track, but it hasn't been used as such for years so last year the city paved a nice walking/bike path with dirt along each side. We set out with lots of bags and water. Not very far into it, we realized some other good turners had been along not necessarily today but at some point previous to us, as there really wasn't that much to be found. Still, there were things here and there and it was a nice walk. Sammy even found an old railroad spike.

The kids kept telling me there were swampy areas ahead with lots of junk in them, and when we made it to them, yah, lots of pop cans and water bottles tossed in. The other good turners must have seen the swampyness as a challenge, but not us! We found some big sticks and went fishing. At least the swamps weren't too big - at the widest point maybe 4 feet wide, and a foot deep tops and overgrown with trees and bushes around. For quite a while the swamp runs along both sides of the path, with the path raised above it about a foot. Carolyn found a little toy frog at one point she wanted to toss in the trash, but I told her it was okay to leave it since some little kid probably left it there as a friend for the frogs that live there. As she was replacing it I heard a soft kind of, "Uh...!" I didn't turn at first, until my brain registered a half-panickyishness (did you know I like to make up words?) to it. I was surprised to see Melanie's bike tire laying down and sticking out of part of the swamp and overgrowth - can't see Melanie, and no more noises. I quickly got over to it, and could see that somehow Melanie had driven off the path and her bike took her right down into the slime. She still wasn't saying anything, but was struggling on top of the bike to get up and out of the mess. Thank goodness she was okay, but pretty covered in mud and other yummy stuff. I am still amazed that there were no tears involved.

After rounding up Adam and Jason, who had of course chosen right then to ride way ahead of us all, I got all the good turners turned back around for an immediate trek home and a big clean up.

So there's our Scouting Commemoration Adventure. Yes, I took pictures after we got home.

Drooling on the Keyboard

*Fellow Chocoholics! - I've had a lot of people finding my blog while searching for these truffles. Read this update, it might help you find some!*

I've got this empty box sitting in front of me, and I just spent about 10 minutes digging for info on where I can find more to fill it. The name on the box is "Petit Tresors Belgian Truffles - Cocoa Dusted Truffles, Imported from Belgium." The epitome of divine. 2.2 lbs of heaven in a box. I am not the only one who feels this way. While looking I found this from someone else: "Obscene, melt in your mouth, unparalleled for the price decadence. Get some, eat them, want for nothing again as long as you live...or until they run out."

How they came to live at our home for a time is interesting. About 9 months ago a scouter friend of ours talked Jamie and I into filling out an application for the District Award of Merit for the other. I thought it was pretty inconvenient at the time, since when he first asked me I had a baby less than a week old, but I recalled as many of Jamie's scouting accomplishments as I could and turned it in. And unknown to me, Jamie did as well for me. A few days after turning them in we each heard the other had been chosen to receive the award, and we each set about sneakily getting the other to attend the district awards dinner where they would be presented. We were each even sly enough to come up with ways to get both of our parents there. Amazingly enough, it remained a secret that we were BOTH getting the award (to us at least), and we were both equally surprised. They read my information first and I quickly realized what had been plotted. We went through a line of hand shaking, were seated on the stage, and after a few lines of the next application Jamie realized he had been had as well.

It was a real honor to receive the award, and cool that we both received it the same night, but here's what I don't get. The wives of the recipients received a lovely bouquet of flowers, the husbands of the recipients received nothing other than this HUGE box of Belgian truffles. WHAT?!? Seeing as how I benefitted on both sides I guess I can't complain too much, but any woman I know would have been far happier with the chocolate than the flowers. Not that flowers aren't nice, but flowers die in days. Eight months later, and we still have some of the truffles around. Hello, women NEED chocolate. Don't people know that by now??? And of course he looooves to hold it over my head that they are his, and especially right after getting them he thought it was hilarious to tell me to "go smell your flowers" while he enjoyed his chocolate. My pitiful attempts to let him smell them if he shared was the weakest trade I've ever heard. Thank goodness he loves me.

It actually contained two separate packages, so we slowly enjoyed the first, and have been hording away the second until a couple of days ago when I talked Jamie in to opening them (after all, they are HIS). Unfortunately, we turned off our air conditioner during a trip away for a week in April, the house got quite warm during that time, and now we pretty much have one giant truffle, no longer really cocoa dusted. Disappointing in that respect, but still luxurious.

And yet I am concerned. Eventually this package too will be gone, and I have no idea where I can get more. There is a web address on the package, but it doesn't work. I hear this past year they were sold at Sam's Club for something like $10, which take my word for it, $10 is a STEAL for these things. I saw some on eBay around Christmas but stupidly kept looking for them locally instead of just buying. Rest assured this search is not over. It may even become my life's quest - to find the ellusive Petit Tresors Cocoa Dusted Belgian Truffles. If I find them I will share it with the world. If you find them, please pass it on and I will be forever in your debt.

A Few Creative Moments Out of the Basement

Jamie (my husband) had me listen to a talk recently on being creative. I'll have to get the source from him, but it was a creative writing instructor at BYU if I remember right. It focused on writing, but the principles applied to probably any creative outlet. It mentioned taking time to be creative in your chosen area every day, and I thought, Gosh, I should be writing in my blog every day. I've wanted to be a writer since elementary school, so I guess I should keep that in practice. This blogging thing is fun, but one of my friends put the pressure on me. After reading my first two posts she called and said, "Those are so funny! You really need to keep writing and keep it funny." There you have it, instant writer's block. Thanks Leslie!

As you can probably tell from the cleaning ideas, I have definite issues with that. Between keeping on top of things, staying halfway organized, and (yikes!) tossing tossing tossing, it's been a big weight on me and something I am always trying to be better at an overcome.

I took 2 hours each of the last 2 nights and watched Masterpiece Theather "Anna Karenina." I've been wanting to read the book, saw the video at the library, and thought, what the heck, at least I can get the storyline before I dive into the HUGE book. Very disturbing story actually, now I'm debating whether to read it or not. There was a great quote in the movie that I assume is also in the book, something to the effect of, "Why do women take on extra duties when they can't handle the ones they've already got?" In the movie Anna's husband was slyly referring to her adulterous relationship, but since I'm the kind of person that loves to take on anything extra to avoid household duties it stabbed me to the core.

Still, I've been making some big leaps and bounds this week. Jamie has been at scout camp all week and I've been attacking the box-filled basement, as it has been threatening to kidnap one of the children. I've been doing some major tossing and lots of organizing, and IT FEELS GREAT! With as well as things are going, I'm expecting the basement to look pretty darn good.

I've spent a lot of thought and prayer on my homemaking issues. Maybe it's one of those things that the time has to be right, because over the past several months I've really felt some attitude changes. I was totally shocked when I realized it was my birthday, I was doing the dishes (one of my least favorite things), and actually didn't mind and was (shhhh!) ALMOST enjoying it. I couldn't really admit it if I was, could I? But it IS nice to walk up to an empty sink rather than an overflowing one.

Off to make dinner so I can dive back into the basement.