One Line

One line from Sister Julie Beck's conference talk:

"There is much distraction and not enough peace and joy."

Every time I hear or read that again I think, "I KNOW!" This past week has especially felt like a very ADHD one for me. Going/thinking/getting pulled in all kinds of directions, no focus whatsoever. It is not a peaceful feeling.

A few days ago I was especially disturbed by it all. Driving somewhere I was trying to think of what I needed to do to center myself, and had the thought to stop thinking about myself and think about someone else. I didn't come up with anyone until I drove past the office my sister works at and realized that I hadn't stopped by to say hi for a few months. When I drove past it again on my way home, I pulled in and chatted with her for a bit. And it helped.

The next day I was making rolls and decided that I should drop some off to my other sister. That helped too.

I can thus deduce that service is one thing that helps me feel more peace and joy. I actually have a quote hanging on my cupboard door that was put there a long time ago to remind me of this:

"Never suppress a generous thought."

My biggest distraction lately is the greatness of others. I love to read about great things people are doing because it is inspiring! But I've noticed that rather than inspiring me to be more of my own kind of greatness, I become distracted from that, wondering if I should be doing what they are doing, or kicking myself because I'm not doing what they are doing.

I was going to post links to some of those things but I don't want to.

Instead, here's a reminder for myself, even if it's only myself. For every great thing that I see others doing that I currently am not doing, or try to do but really struggle with, I know people that I love and admire that also do not have those qualities. Some of them are the very opposite of those qualities (like me), yet they are incredible people that have wonderful children and they should probably have already been translated, but thank goodness they haven't because then I couldn't love and admire them nearly as closely and easily. TA DA!!!

The lesson in all that is that I need to stop being distracted by everything I'm not doing. I was sent here with my own package of talents and my own mission to fulfill. Theirs is not mine, mine is not theirs. I need to be "distinct and different--in happy ways," not the same and discouraged. My family will be blessed when I'm working on those things, because then I WILL be feeling the "peace and joy" Sister Beck talked about, and will then share that with them.

I read the rest of her talk again and found some more especially applicable quotes.

"A good woman knows that she does not have enough time, energy, or opportunity to take care of all of the people or do all of the worthy things her heart yearns to do. Life is not calm for most women, and each day seems to require the accomplishment of a million things, most of which are important. A good woman must constantly resist alluring and deceptive messages from many sources... But with personal revelation, she can prioritize correctly and navigate this life confidently."

"Good women always have a desire to know if they are succeeding. In a world where the measures of success are often distorted, it is important to seek appreciation and affirmation from proper sources. To paraphrase a list found in Preach My Gospel, we are doing well when we develop attributes of Christ and strive to obey His gospel with exactness. We are doing well when we seek to improve ourselves and do our best. We are doing well when we increase faith and personal righteousness, strengthen families and homes, and seek out and help others who are in need. We know we are successful if we live so that we qualify for, receive, and know how to follow the Spirit. When we have done our very best, we may still experience disappointments, but we will not be disappointed in ourselves. We can feel certain that the Lord is pleased when we feel the Spirit working through us. Peace, joy, and hope are available to those who measure success properly."

Thank you, Sister Beck!

A Challenge - General Conference

We had an INCREDIBLE general conference in April. I've told several people that I don't know why they even watched it, because I'm sure the prophet got a personal phone call and was told that every talk was to be written with me in mind. There was just so so much I needed to hear.

As soon as the audio was available online, I downloaded it all to my iPod and have spent many many middle of the night feedings listening to these great words of counsel. I even created a folder on it and tagged a bunch of them as "Better Mommy" talks so that when I need a boost in that area (truth be told, daily) I can go right there.

Unfortunately, I haven't seen a lot of talk online about things people learned from conference, myself included. I've started several posts on conference related topics but haven't finished them. So I want to send out a challenge to anyone interested. If there was a particular talk/theme/quote/anything/etc. from conference that has lifted you and made you better, I would love to hear about it. Feel free to do more than one even! I always get more out of the talks when I can discuss them with others.

If you'd like, post a link in the comments when you do so my other two readers can enjoy your thoughts as well.

We are the Staff

This is a song we've sang as a staff every year I've been to Wood Badge. I was going to share it with the staff I get to work with this year and went searching online to see if I had all the words right, but came up with nothing! I have no idea where the song came from, who wrote it, or where it started. But I thought I would get it online in case anyone else happened to go looking for it.

WE ARE THE STAFF

We are the staff of Gilwell Troop 1.
We do the work while you have the fun.
We answer questions by the score,
You stay up late to think up more.
We get up early, work hard all day.
You stay up late then come out to play.
What a gravy train you have,
At the expense of, at the expense of,
At the expense of staff!

I have no "this is to the tune of..." tips, so if you'd like to learn it as I learned it, get me your e-mail address and we'll work something out.

And for fun, a few Wood Badge staff pictures.

What can I say, they love me!

Launching water balloons

You can find me since I've got a blue cow blanket keeping the baby (then Erin) warm.

Always follow your Scoutmaster's example (staff jackets are inside out, hats on backwards).

I have no idea who this is...

...or this.

Maybe the flipped version of the "We are the Staff" song (sung towards the end of the week) is appropriate:

We are the staff of Gilwell Troop 1.

You do the work while we have the fun!

You answer questions by the score,

We stay up late to think up more.

You get up early, work hard all day.

We stay up late then come out to play.

What a gravy train we have

At the expense of, at the expense of,

At the expense of YOU!

I LOVE SCOUTING! With this being the 100 year anniversary of the Boy Scouts of America, I definitely need to write more about this. I believe it is an inspired program, designed to guide boys to becoming great men. Thankfully, I get to serve on another Wood Badge staff again this summer, where we train the scout leaders in leadership skills they can then take back to the boys.

Back to Gilwell!!!

WOO HOO!!

Aimee Ray, author of "Doodle Stitching" (thanks again Cindi!) had a giveaway for a new book she's got a project in, and I won!

Check out my name in print (I feel so famous) and my "acceptance speech."

And by the way, she's coming out with another "Doodle Stitching" book in October. The instructions and designs in the first one are wonderful. Can't wait to see round 2.

Liken - David and Goliath

Blanche was climbing on her father's knee, begging for one of his Sunday stories.

The narration, in his low tones, roused [Ethel] from her mood of vexation. It was the story of David, which he told in language scriptural and poetical, so pretty and tender in its simplicity, that she could not choose but attend. Ever and anon there was a glance towards Harry, as if he were secretly likening his own "yellow haired laddied" to the "shepherd boy, ruddy, and of a fair countenance."

"So Tom and Blanche," he concluded, "can you tell me how we may be like the shepherd-boy, David?"

"There aren't giants now," said Tom.

"Wrong is a giant," said his little sister.

"Right, my white May-flower, and what then?"

"We are to fight," said Tom.

"Yes, and mind, the giant with all his armour may be some great thing we have to do: but what did David begin with when he was younger?"

"The lion and the bear."

"Aye, and minding his sheep. Perhaps little things, now you are little children, maybe be like the lion and the bear--so kill them them off--get rid of them--cure yourself of whining or dawdling, or whatever it be, and mind your sheep well," said he, smiling sweetly in answer to the children's earnest looks as they caught his meaning, "and if you do, you will not find it near so hard to deal with your great giant struggle when it comes."

Ah! thought Ethel, it suits me as well as the children. I have a great giant... and here I am, not allowed to attack him, because, perhaps, I am not minding my sheep, and letting my lion and my bear run loose about the house." (pp. 83-84)

[Ethel's] lion and bear . . . were the greatest hindrances to her doing anything good and great." (p. 87)

from "The Daisy Chain" by Mary Charlotte Yonge

Marni Half a Brain

A few months ago Melanie told me something that I thought was incredibly clever.

"Mom, you should be extra smart right now because you have two brains!"

I praised her for great thinking, then explained that unfortunately, half the brain in my head slid down to the baby.

Upon giving birth, this has proven to be true, since I feel like I only have half a brain now.

I've decided that new mommy brain is far worse than preggo brain. I wonder how long it takes for those cells to regenerate... if they do. I think they do, because I remember feeling significantly smarter than I do right now about 10 months ago.

Thank goodness we have plenty of books in my current reading level around here right now, like Hat by Paul Hoppe and a few Elephant and Piggie books by Mo Willems (we love anything Mo Willems).

Maynard

We discovered some ultra super amazingly fun storytelling CDs recently by Willy Claflin. Go right now to your library website and put them on hold.

First we checked out "Uglified Ducky," which I guess is a book as well. The library didn't have the book so I tried the CD. I would still like to read the book sometime, but Mr. Claflin, I mean Maynard Moose, tells it so well that I'm not sure the story would be as good. Though I'm sure the pictures would be fun.

We enjoyed Uglified Ducky so much during our next library trip we had to get the three others they have:

Maynard Moose: Sleeping Beastly and Other Tales
Maynard Moose Tales
The Wolf Under the Bed

Warning #1: Rocky Raccoon sings a song about eating sugar all the time. "When your soul starts to sag, open up yourself a 10 pound bag." So if your children want to try everything they see/hear or if you are religiously opposed to sugar even in jest, skip that one.

Warning #2: Maynard Moose is a very creative speaker, using works like uglified, bandridged (bandaged), demember (remember). We thought it was cool and funny, but thought I would throw that out in case you think you wouldn't.

Warning #3: With these playing in your car, your children might be more distracted by the songs and stories than by which of their siblings is touching them, looking at them, looking out their window, etc. Again I find this a bonus, but realize that some enjoy sibling interaction in all its varieties.

Adorable, Even If I Do Say So Myself

I have to send out a huge thanks to my amazing friend, Kathryn. She came over last week and took some beautiful pictures of our baby girl. Today she surprised us by dropping off a stack of pictures and a CD. It's nice to have friends with talent.

Speaking of which, we've had some superbly delicious dinners brought over as well. I have a lot of future dinners to make to help pass on all the kindness.

And the Award Goes To...

While I was hanging out at the hospital, calling for room service and getting my toenails painted (seriously gals, I know the hospital to deliver at), I was tumbling blog post ideas through my head. Then I came home and reality hit, so it hasn't exactly been top priority. Almost a week ago I was told it was high time my new little friend was introduced on my blog, so here she is!


Madeleine Anne was born March 11 at 12:59pm. She weighed in at a perfectly average 7 lbs. 5 oz. and 20 inches long. Her family all thinks she is above averagely beautiful.

During my hospital stay I had several favorites I wanted to give kudos to, so here they are.

Favorite Doctor: The lovely and talented Dr. Sharon Fillerup (yes, you read that right). She delivered all four of the girls, and has even changed some of their nasty first diapers and attended blessings and birthday parties. The kids call her Aunt Sharon. We love you!


Favorite Visitors: Most definitely the other kids! They were so excited to meet the new baby, and they found out it was a girl when they arrived at the hospital. Those who wanted a brother quickly forgot about that and fell fiercely in love with her.


Favorite Picture: This is what I meant by that last comment.


Favorite Compliment: From the anesthesiologist after the epidural, "You have a really skinny back!" After all, he sees a lot of backs, right? Speaking of which...

Favorite Drug: I love you Epidural. Labor is such a beautiful thing as soon as you arrive.

Favorite Movie: "Pure Luck" with Martin Short and Danny Glover. Thank you for coming out on DVD just in time!

Favorite Dodge: Not going to the "How to Take Care of Your New Baby" class. Hello, I've done this already. Scrub the head, take care of the cord, feed them, change them. Did I miss anything?

Favorite Hospital Service: Our hospital now has a salon inside, and offers a free spa service to all new moms! The choices included a haircut, style, manicure, pedicure, and facial. For the facial and pedicure they do it right in your room, so I chose the pedicure. Wonderful, wonderful!

Favorite Meal: The "candlelight" dinner (with no candlelight) with Jamie, provided by the hospital for the new parents.

Favorite Support Person: My wonderful husband, before, during, and after. Before baby when my body needed a break on the couch, he would take over. During labor he would constantly check to make sure I was okay and had what I needed. Since Madeleine was born he's made pretty much every meal, done the dishes, ran kids where they needed to be... and is the cutest daddy ever with his new little girl.

10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1....

Time is running short for this bout of baby creation. The doc is back in town (she took a couple weeks "off" to do humanitarian surgeries in Africa), so at 39 weeks tomorrow, anytime baby decides he/she is ready, I'm more than ready to oblige.

Loving the little kicks and love taps (and yes, even the future soccer/football player ones) while I can. That's something I always miss - having a little friend rolling around inside, giving me secret hellos everywhere I go. All the aches, pains, and fatigue are worth it in the end.

Can't wait to be done with maternity clothes, though. Still repairing, though I decided some are beyond that and are already retired. Jamie suggested using the pants for a jean quilt sometime. I think that will be a worthy tribute. About anytime I'm home anymore I'm in pajama pants, both for comfort and to slow wear and tear on the jeans.

Looking forward to being able to think clearly and in complete thoughts again one of these days. Really looking forward to sleeping on my tummy again. Every time I see Jamie reading that way I send him a glare even if he doesn't see it. So rude.

He does redeem himself, though. I'm so grateful for my wonderful husband. He takes care of things when I need to love the couch for a while, taking over dinner, making sure dishes are done, and letting the other littles watch videos next to him while he's trying to work. He hasn't even made any wisecracks about my size for a while. I'm excited to be sharing the special time at the hospital with him for the sixth time. I love that those are memories only he and I share. (Along with the doctor and however many nurses, med students, etc. that happen to show up.)

Our favorite labor and delivery flick, "Pure Luck," even finally came out on DVD, just in time! I hadn't seen it before, but when I was in labor with Adam either the hospital had it or Jamie went and rented it. After that it became a tradition when we could find it.

My body is having fun practicing for all the excitement. I keep telling it it's fine to go into labor on its own, sending lots of happy labor inducing vibes. It hasn't worked for any of the other kids, so I'm not holding out too much hope.

One final thought - I need to write things down more. I don't have a lot written about the different deliveries, but it's definitely a topic that comes up quite often when a bunch of women get together. As soon as it starts I need to pull out pencil and paper, because all of their memories get mine going, and pretty soon I would have quite a bit written down. I thought of that all on my own just last night - preggo brain and all.

Come on baby! We're ready to get to know you!

My Maternity Clothes are Revolting

Does anyone really like wearing maternity clothes? Try as you may, they really are not very flattering. I've had comments from people telling me how cute I look, but I know it's not true. There was a time maybe, but at over 8 months pregnant I think I'm beyond the cute stage and have most definitely moved onto the "wow, you look miserable" stage. About a month ago I had someone act surprised when I told them I'm expecting. Hello, I'm not stupid.

While I'm always happy to be done with maternity clothes and move back to the real deal, this time it's different. My maternity clothes are revolting against me. I'm not sure how to take this turn of events. Can they do that? I must say that with all this belly sticking out I'm surprised I haven't created any holes in my shirts, but the pants, oh the pants. One pair is quickly wearing a hole a few inches above the knee, though I haven't figured out why or how in such a spot (it's worse now than when I took this picture).

Another pair is getting holes and runs galore in the stretchy panel.

I made some fabulous repairs, and within a week I have another gaping hole.

I'm feeling a lot more gratitude for them and all I ask them to do. More humble knowing that if they choose to totally fail me I won't have many options left, especially since I am NOT buying any more at this point. In light of all that...

Dear Maternity Pants,

I know I complain about you. I know that with 4 weeks to go I've been weighing more than I have at delivery every other time. I know that I've asked you to snuggle around me and 2.9 babies now [bought while pregnant with baby #4]. I know I keep joking that I'm going to start wearing sweats or PJs everywhere I go, but I really don't want to. I do love jeans. Yes, even if they have stretchy panels on them. I don't want to look slobby everywhere I go. Can you please please please hold together for just a few more weeks? I promise to give you a very well-deserved break after that. After all, think of all the sweetness you get to wrap that stretchy panel around.

Love,

Me

(All ready to take to the hospital - girl outfit and blankie in case it's a girl, boy outfit and blankie in case it's a boy.)

Who Do You Think I Am Typealyzer?

I'm up way too late but I just saw a link to this site, typealyzer.com, that analyzes the "personality" of your blog. How luring is that? Here's the analysis for mine, let me know what you think.

The analysis indicates that the author of http://stillswinging.blogspot.com is of the type:

ESFP - The Performers

The entertaining and friendly type. They are especially attuned to pleasure and beauty and like to fill their surroundings with soft fabrics, bright colors and sweet smells. They live in the present moment and don´t like to plan ahead - they are always in risk of exhausting themselves.

The enjoy work that makes them able to help other people in a concrete and visible way. They tend to avoid conflicts and rarely initiate confrontation - qualities that can make it hard for them in management positions.

It even includes this nifty graphic which supposedly displays the dominant parts of my brain that I use while writing this blog. I call it, "My Brain on Blogs." According to them, apparently I don't think enough, which in reality, I always feel like I think way too much about what I post here, before and after.

Does it fit me? I'll save my opinion.